Wednesday, May 16, 2007

Not so well concealed Bias.

For the most part, those of us on "the list" could have probably thought that Romney was endorsed by one particular law student. Today, however, the cat is out of the bag. The Bias has shone through the torrential downpour of emails!

Please see exhibit A:

GOP Debate: Romney backs "enhanced terrorism techniques" (i.e. torture)

GOP Debate: On The Use of Torture
Washington Post
Chris Cillizza

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Tuesday, May 08, 2007

Not a day too soon...

While I did vow to quit, I felt it necessary to comment on this topic...sort of...

Yesterday brought another email with four (count them 1,2,3,4) new links to stuff about the crap that there were a billion links to before. I don't know what the topic is, or was, since I didn't read any of the first 8 trillian links, but I did want to comment about what it made me think of:

Why don't I start making my entire day's worth of browser history available both in web viewable form, podcast, and mass email? I know the idea is unoriginal (as demonstrated by the content of my previous post) but I am still looking for something to do with the 14 hours of free time I have each day when I'm not working, reading email from bohn, or spending time with my family. Stay tuned.

More On Mormonism at Washington Post's "On Faith" (Including Harry Reid)

blah, blah, blah

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Sunday, May 06, 2007

The Proverbial Towel.

Consider this a farewell of sorts. I almost made it a whole month, reading (or at least not immediately deleting) every piece of email from Mr. Bohn. Alas, I was incapable of keeping up with the pace. I know, I am a wuss. I never should have even taken up the challenge. (but in my defense, there were at least 72 of them!)

The scary part is how I estimated that there would be 64 for the month, and in fact, there were more. That is why I am getting out now, since the future looks very grim. However, I'll still (possibly) comment on things where I actually have an opinion, so maybe sometime in say... oh a few years I'll get one of those. Until then, I'll leave you with the backlog from the past week:

Date: May 6, 2007 3:33:24 PM CDT
Subject: New Church Statement on Doctrine: "Approaching Mormon Doctrine"

Date: May 6, 2007 3:30:13 PM CDT
Subject: KUED/KBYU Program on Utah response to "The Mormons" Documentary

Date: May 6, 2007 2:08:25 AM CDT
Subject: SL Trib: LDS Church and Politics

Date: May 6, 2007 1:54:56 AM CDT
Subject: Washington Post: In Speech At Regent U., Romney Reaches Out to Christian Right

Date: May 6, 2007 1:42:18 AM CDT
Subject: SL Trib: Rocky, Hannity go at it before rowdy crowd
and of course a second

Date: May 6, 2007 1:35:48 AM CDT
Subject: Bob Novak: Massacre Movie Miffing Mitt

Date: May 6, 2007 1:29:33 AM CDT
Subject: Forbes: When Faith Is A Serious Business (Romney)

This email typifies both why I started this blog, and why I am ending this blog.

Date: May 6, 2007 1:19:19 AM CDT
Subject: Fascinating Discussion On Mormonism at Washington Post's "On Faith" Last Week

(but don't forget:

No Theological Test for Citizenship
Public Service and Private Beliefs
Lifelong Mormon Sustained by Faith
Good People, Bizarre Beliefs
Evangelicals, Mormons On Same Side Of Cultural Divide
'Peaceful, Industrious and Law-Abiding People'
A Need for "Convicted Civility" in our Dialogue
Mormons in the Mythical Mainstream
Americans but not Christians
Mainstreaming the Mormons
Ignorance of the Faith, Tolerance for the Faithful
Admired, But From a Distance
Should Christians Vote for Mormons?
LDS: Christ-Centered and World-Wide
Long Way from Mainstream
"Isms" Pollute the Mainstream
Old Religions Or Cult Classics
Mormons: Time Sanctifies Everything

Date: May 5, 2007 10:48:11 AM CDT
Subject: AP: As He Tries To Court Evangelicals, Romney Travels To Regent University

Date: May 4, 2007 9:37:56 PM CDT
Subject: Annenberg Factcheck: GOP Debate

Date: May 4, 2007 9:36:25 PM CDT
Subject: Deseret News: Seattle Missionary Killed In Bike Wreck

Date: May 4, 2007 4:31:30 PM CDT
Subject: Politico: Romney Followed By McCain Seem To Come Out Ahead In GOP Debate

Date: May 4, 2007 9:26:29 AM CDT
Subject: SL Trib (Op-Ed by BYU Professor): As Cheney Goes Down In Flames...

Date: May 4, 2007 12:32:06 AM CDT
Subject: SL Trib Editorial: 'The Mormons': PBS Documentary Brilliant In Its Balance

Date: May 3, 2007 10:08:57 PM CDT
Subject: Washington Post: The Governor Speaks From A New Pulpit

Date: May 3, 2007 3:03:55 PM CDT
Subject: SL Trib: Documentary Breaks PBS Record In Utah

Date: May 2, 2007 1:00:20 PM CDT
Subject: LDS Response to "Mormons" Documentary

Date: May 2, 2007 11:49:36 AM CDT
Subject: Deseret News: "Mormons" Elicits A Mixed Response

Date: May 2, 2007 11:47:19 AM CDT
Subject: Deseret News: Romney Commencement Address To Regent U May Skirt Religion

Date: May 1, 2007 6:18:12 AM CDT
Subject: AP: Movie Revives Debate About Massacre

Date: April 30, 2007 12:46:53 PM CDT
Subject: New York Times review of tonight's PBS Documentary "The Mormons"

Date: April 30, 2007 7:34:21 AM CDT
Subject: Kirby: Cheney gets his revenge

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Sunday, April 29, 2007


Nice Job America! Sometimes I'm less proud to be an American. This is one of those times...

P.S. Article is too long and boring, but I got the gist after the first paragraph.
Washington Post: 82 Inmates Cleared But Still Held At Guantanamo
*82 Inmates Cleared but Still Held at Guantanamo*
U.S. Cites Difficulty Deporting Detainees

By Craig Whitlock
Washington Post Foreign Service

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Hoping this is really the last...

I really hope this is the last one ever about cheney visiting byu. Please?

NPR: Quiet Protest Greets Vice President Cheney At BYU

Quiet Protest Greets Vice President Cheney at BYU
by Howard Berkes
NPR Morning Edition, April 27, 2007 ยท Vice President Dick Cheney delivered the commencement address Thursday at Brigham Young University. On a campus where dissent is unusual, about 100 people protested quietly ahead of Cheney's arrival. He told the audience to be prepared for the unexpected throughout life.

Listen Here

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More on Mormon Documentary...

Ok Marc, I get the picture. I have it on my calendar, I'm going to watch it. Now lay off... until you have your own personal review, which I'd be happy to hear.

More Interesting Press Coverage On PBS Documentary "The Mormons"


Filmmaker gives Mormons national exposure
Mormon documentary is riveting, balanced

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Mormonism a Racket?

Hmm, this was a very jealous sounding, arrogant article. But I'm sure the author will have a wonderful following a century or so after now, and probably millions of people will have read his great works. He'd make a great mormon. Maybe after he dies?

Another Hit Job On Slate.Com: "Mormonism: A Racket Becomes a Religion"

This week Slate published an absolutely terrible trilogy of excepts from Vanity Fair Columnist Christopher Hitchens new book "God Is Not Great: How Religion Poisons Everything." Part one puts forth Hitchens "objections" to religion (where takes jabs Pascal and C.S. Lewis). Part two "explores" whether Muhammad was an epileptic. And shameful part three is another hit piece on Mormonism (following Jacob Weisberg's bit of religious bigotry last December):

Mormonism: A Racket Becomes A Religion
What happens when a racket turns into a religion? Mormonism.
By Christopher Hitchens

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Rush Limbaugh?

We have two firsts in this. Rush Limbaugh and an audio clip. However, don't waste your time. I didn't think this Limbaugh guy was still around?

Limbaugh Sinks To New Low

Limbaugh takes on Obama with parody song "Barack the Magic Negro" (referencing this terrible LA Times op-edlast month).

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I take back everything I ever said good about Robert Kirby. I can't have this filth in my house.

Kirby: You Can't Be Happy If You're Not In, Right?


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The crazy things people yell out of car windows...

I used to wonder who it is that is rude, and yells things out of car windows. Then, I went to high-school and realized it was me, and my friends. That was a wonderful realization.

But, I must say "traitors!," "losers!" and "we'll be praying for you!"? Come on guys, there is sooooo much more you could have yelled. Kids these days.

SL Trib: Cheney Demonstrators Follow BYU Conduct Rules, But Passer-Bys Less Civil


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Dirty mormon laundry... I hope no one sees my skid marks.

Washington Post: Debating History: Did Brigham Young Order A Massacre?

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The Mormons

I am looking forward to this documentary. As a life-long mormon, I think it will be good to finally learn a little something about my religion. Besides, if I don't watch it who will?

Early Reviews of PBS Documentary "The Mormons" (Airs April 30th & May 1st)

A documentarian looks at 'The Mormons'
A gripping look at foundations of Mormon faith

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What I love about being an American.

I do actually care about this recent ruling, and hope that it is overturned. However, I am too lazy (and busy keeping up with the Man) to actually do anything about it. So, if you have a chance, send a letter to my congressmen too. thanks,

Save Internet Radio - Ask Your Congressperson To Support "Internet Radio Equality Act"

This bill was just introduced to reverse a decision by the US Copyright Royalty Board that will raise royalty rates paid by Net radio operators from 300-1200% in the next few years. This would end up shutting down over 75% of current net radio providers.The bill would provide for a more modest increase of 30% by 2010. If you've ever used a website like, you know it's worth saving. A call or email to your Congressional
representatives is the only way to do it:

House of Representatives Contact Info
Senate Contact Info

A related article:

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Okay, this is not even funny anymore. Was it ever? This is just amazing. I cannot believe a) that Marc doesn't work for the SL Tribune (they should be filing a DMCA takedown with him soon... or me for substantial infringement...) b) that this is finally over
and c) that I still don't care.

Please note my comments below...

Warm Welcome For Cheney; Vice President Avoids Politics; Nader Urges BYU Grads To Serve Country

Warm welcome for Cheney: 20,000 cheer him repeatedly; he hails Y. accomplishment
Of course they applauded! President Hinkley was there!

Vice president avoids politics in speech to BYU grads
Thank goodness! Things could have gone to boring to boring-er.

Cheney demonstrators, pro and con, flock to traditionally quiet, conservative BYU
I was asleep before I finished the title.

Nader urges BYU grads to serve country, not seek profits
Hmm, $15,000 / 50 = $300 for each byu grad in attendance. Wow, I bet that was worth it. I know I would have loved to pay $300 more to attend commencement. The cap and gown cartel wasn't enough of a rip off for me.
"Ralph Nader encouraged graduates and more than a thousand supporters to seek a higher road and not be enticed by material promises." ... while pocketing his hard earned $15,000, and trying hard not to break into laughter at the insanity of it all.

Nader challenges decision to invite v.p.
'Cause I am sure that Cheney got paid more... (a degree for one, which, at BYU, typically costs about $12000)

Cheney on way to BYU after visit with LDS President Hinckley
News eh? I think Marc wanted to set a record for most boring articles in a single spam, but this one sunk to an all-time new low. I'll bet the Prophet has about 300 visits a year. I anticipate getting an email for each of these by the year 2008.

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Satan's REAL plan...

I am glad no one ever quotes me in the main stream media. We all say stupid stuff, but most people don't care. Why should we care when politicians do it? I don't.

Deseret News: Utah County GOP Delegate Equates Illegal Immigration To Satan's Plan
County GOP delegate links illegal immigration to Satan,1249,660215179,00.html

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Honorary Degrees?

Here I am, slaving away on my "Doctorate" and some places are just giving them out? WTF? Does U.S. News do a ranking of best schools for hand-out honorary doctorates? Keep me posted.

Deseret News: BYU to Give Cheney Honorary Degree

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Religion and Good kids.

Interesting article... (even if it is "social science"). Rather than rely on a random sample and "evidence" and statistics, I prefer to view things from my experience. Today in church one of my kids, was very well behaved. The other, was less so. Therefore, there is a 50% chance that kids of religious parents will be good, and 50% chance they'll be bad. How's that for Science?

Yahoo News: Study Shows Religion Is Good For Kids

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The Normons on PBS?

Mormons are in the press. That is the self fulfilled prophecy of this article.

USA Today: Mormon Story Opens Up


Tuesday, April 24, 2007

What the BBQ club president could have done...

This story summarizes what our Beloved Humble BYU BBQ Club president dreamed of accomplishing. But he was a few years too early, and president of the wrong club. Sorry Marc.

P.S. So who wins the bet on when the BYUBBQC would be totally non-existant? I think I guessed 2 semesters...

Deseret News: Protest Leader Walks Fine Line
Protest leader walks fine line
She tries to protect Y. and church from ridicule,1249,660214543,00.html

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Just 2 more days...

Then we can all go back to talking about how BYU zoobesses can easily manifest their eligibility for marriage, rather than talking about real issues. I can hardly wait.

Incidentally, I think I went to elementary school with the kid who put up that definition for zoobie in the Urban dictionary...
SL Trib: Cheney will call on LDS leaders while in Utah

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I don't know where this blog is headed, or what rules decide what topics will be covered. I do know that this was an unexpected topic. Furthermore, I believe it to be a boring one. Please stick to the One and Only True Church On The Face of the Earth, and let me know when someone from BYU is protesting it, please.

LA Times: Pope Approves Advisory Study Saying Unbaptized Babies May To Heaven
Vatican panel condemns limbo to eternal dustbin
An advisory study, approved by the pope, concludes that unbaptized babies may go to heaven after all.,1,4318831,full.story?coll=la-headlines-world&ctrack=2&cset=true

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I really think something has changed since this dreadful day. Fewer emails, more Kirby. Is it a good thing? I'd say yes.

Kirby: It's Time For Someone Else To Look After My Parents

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Saturday, April 21, 2007

Preemptive strike...

Those of you who are on The List, will perhaps notice that this particular article hasn't (yet) appeared. I am however proactively posting it here, under the assumption that it will soon be sent out (or one like it).

I mean, it has all the elements: Senator Reid, Mitt Romney, politics, boringness...

Anywho, I think we should put the two together in an Elder's quorum discussing the later chapters of Alma. That ought to bring us some entertainment...

P.S. I particularly liked this B. Clintonesque comment from the Rom:
Asked if we are winning the war, Romney said that "it depends on how you define that."


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Friday, April 20, 2007

1125 words not worth reading.

I am going to call BS on this Marc. There is no way, that 60 people care about this. Maybe if you include dead people or pets, but not living, breathing, conscious, warm blooded humans. I can see maybe 60 people caring enough to read most of the headline, however, so that is all I'll include below.

Deseret News: House Passes Bill Giving Utah 4th Congressional Seat

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cheney, byu, boring

Hopefully this is almost over? It has gone from boring to uberboring.
SL Trib: BYU Officials Decline To Meet With Cheney Petitioners

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At the risk of sounding ignorant, I am going to simply pose a question: who is Mr. Doolittle, and what has he done for anyone?

FBI Raids LDS Rep. Doolittle's House; Doolittle Gives Up Committee Seat

FBI Searches Congressman's Home
Rep. Doolittle Gives Up Committee Seat

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Entertaining, but confusing as well

Pretty funny list of pros/cons... but I can't figure out why Marc sent it... no reference at all to mormonism, or mitt romney? Must have been an accident.

Sweeney's: Pros and Cons of the Top 20 Democratic Presidential Candidates

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Alternative commencement?

While I've already commented on this alternative commencement, I'll offer a few more words of advice, this time to the organizers (as they seem to be having a hard time booking a place to hold this interesting, and important event.). Here is my advice, free of charge: borrow your mom's minivan. It should be more than adequate for the "crowds" you're likely to have. I think I had almost as many comments on this blog as they had petition signers... if that is saying anything.

BYU group confirms Nader as speaker

Provo school district cancels venue agreement

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I have nothing to say about this.

SL Trib article on BYU's honor code change on homosexuality

BYU changes honor code text about gay students It now says stated orientation is not an issue and clarifies which actions are violations

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Maybe if I cared at all about sports?

Perhaps if I cared at all about sports this one would have been interesting? No, probably not. BYU has named a new quarterback... do you think I, or really anyone outside of a few hundred people are going to know who this is? Not likely... so why is this news/spam-worthy? It's not. I took the liberty to extract all the relevant information from this email:

"Head coach Bronco Mendenhall named Arizona State transfer Max Hall the starter"

Thanks, I'm glad I know now. Go max(i?)!

Deseret News: BYU Names Starting Quarterback


This one was not particularly interesting. Mitt picked on something that Hilary said, which he in the past has said as well... not really something important either... BORING!

AP: Romney Takes Back Endorsement Of Clinton's "Village" Concept


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Trying times...

I decided that I should point Mr. Bohn to this blog, since he probably was wondering why he didn't hear back from me about every article I had received. I was a bit apprehensive, thinking he might... over-react... and I'd be the recipient of hundreds of make-up phone calls. Fortunately, he seemed okay with it (although he didn't bother to comment on any of my wonderful commentary?). However, I had a bit of a scare after I told him. When I chose to inform him, I had received no less than 42 emails for the month of April. After sending my little message, not one, but TWO days passed, without a single bohnspam. I was biting my fingers, hitting "reload" every few minutes. I even went so far as to send a few emails to my account to make sure it was still working. It was, but the spam seemed to just stop. Might I have finally achieved the elusive goal of removal from the list? I had to know! I initiated a chat with the Man. He said he had not removed me from the list... whew! A sigh of... uh, relief?

While I had his attention, I thought it would be opportune to ask a few questions that have been plaguing me... I found the following interesting:

Since his last "disclose everyone on the list" email, a few changes have been made to the list...

Q: how many people are on the list now? have you added anyone since my last count (last time you didn't bcc)?
A: I think I've added 5 people and dropped two

Which lead me to the OBVIOUS question:
Q: you dropped two? how did they do it? death threats or death itself?
A:Nate Davis never checks his hotmail so now it doesn't work... and
And a non-Mormon who I occasionally include in my non-mormon emails I was always deleting from the list when I sent it out, so I thought I'd save myself the time

So, it became apparent that I either needed to stop checking my email and close my account or I need to leave the Mormon church. I think the latter is actually more likely. (and I know the first may not actually work, since I did try bouncing my emails from him for a time, but he asked why, and got angry at me for doing so...)

Also of interest:
Q: does anyone reply back... often?
A: Yeah.... depending on the article 5 or 6

Q: why haven't you done a blog for this stuff instead of mass mailing? then people can respond and have a real dialog... and those who are less interested can more readily ignore? you can have mine if you don't want to start from scratch.
A: Blog takes more work. I've told nearly everyone they can opt off if they like. Most people on the list want to be there

This last response naturally led to a bit of a conversation involving "consent"...

Q: everyone but me?
A: I asked you back when you bounced me... I can forward you the exchange if you like

I thought to myself... hmm, I don't remember it quite like that... or do I?

Then, after more than 10 minutes (that is a really long time when it comes to Marc Bohn producing "evidence" in a discussion like this... he replied:

So I'm having trouble finding it. But after you razzed me about emails I distinctly remember asking you if you'd like off the list. Perhaps you'll say I'm dreaming though since it appears you would have jumped at the opportunity to be removed....
I'm sifting through out MSN chat record...
Ugh... we chatted a lot
Nevermind. Easy way to settle this. Feel free to ask off the list if you ever want to be removed.

Which is where the conversation ended. It put me in a very difficult spot... a point blank, easy way off the list... you'd think the answer would be simple... "okay, remove me" but I guess I'm not ready to quit this exchange... just yet. So I said nothing.

And over the next 5 days, I had 9 new emails fresh in the box, just waiting for a witty response... and I have no one to blame but myself.

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Sunday, April 15, 2007

Classical Music is Still Overrated

While the article and idea had great promise... it was about 15,000,000 words too long. I recommend watching the videos, and reading my answer to the proposed question below:

"What would happen if the Joshua Bell, a virtuoso violinist who won the Avery
Fisher prize as the best classical musician in America, dressed down like a
street performer and played for an hour at a busy D.C. metro stop? The
Washington Post arranged to find out. "

Answer: No one would care. He makes like $30 bucks (which I would have been grateful for), and only like 5 people even stopped to listen. Classical music is still overrated.

One Pretty Cool Story...

What would happen if the Joshua Bell, a virtuoso violinist who won the Avery
Fisher prize as the best classical musician in America, dressed down like a
street performer and played for an hour at a busy D.C. metro stop? The
Washington Post arranged to find out.


Another good kirby article.

For those of you who are bored by all this... (read everyone including myself), why not cut out the middleman (or middlemen)? Most of the good stuff will probably appear here first.

Kirby: Prompted By Filthy Lucre To Give My Testimony


Saturday, April 14, 2007

Finally, an article I have real comments on...

This article brings us to the age old question... if a tree falls in the forest and no one is there to hear it fall, does it make a sound?
Answer: only if Marc Bohn forwards it to everyone in his address book, and you forward it to at least 10 of your friends!

Maybe I was most annoyed by this moronic comment:
"Film is the most powerful and most influential art form in the history of mankind."

to which I would add:

"excluding literature, music, and potato chip lookalikes."

"Mormonism desperately needs excellent filmmakers who understand the language of cinema, the eloquence of images."

Which is why I applaud you for setting the precedent and moving out of "Mormonism" so that this need can be met.

A few parting thoughts mr... Dutcher was it?
1) Don't let the door hit your bottom on the way out...
2) When you realize that the world is big and cold, you're welcome to come back and make mediocre "Mormon" films again.

Daily Herald: Richard Dutcher: "Parting Words" on Mormon Movies


A reminder or why I created this blog.

This email needs no summary. (Frankly, I could have done without receiving it). I only post the links as proof that, yes he really did send 4 more links to Romney Articles. I wouldn't believe it either without proof (and more proof).

Please don't click on them or read them!!!

Feel free to comment on the Marc's motives for sending this barrage of crap.
My theory: get me so blasted sick of Romney that I wouldn't let anyone I know even utter his name, let alone vote for him?

Smattering of Recent Romney Articles (Economist, Washington Post, Boston Globe, AP)

Mitt the Moneymaker

Romney Plays Down Role in Health Law

Romney Jokes About Hunting Flap

Giuliani Cash On Hand Rivals Romney

Why can't they all be like this?

Short, sweet, and worth reading. (all 10 words!)

Classic Onion


Friday, April 13, 2007

Time for the real protests...

If this doesn't incite real protests at the Y, then things have drastically changed since I was there...

Then again, I personally view these current changes as minor in comparison to the (in my view discriminatory) wording of the mustache section. "If worn..." hmmph, that should read "When worn by the most manly of manfolk (or womankind)".

BYU Changes Honor Code Regarding Homosexuality


You'd think with a college education...

... that these students would have learned that commencement is something you want to avoid at all costs. Attending more than one is disrespectful and hateful to one's self.

Deseret News: Ralph Nader May Speak Opposite Cheney at "Alternative Off-Campus Commencement"


Nader may speak at Provo rally,1249,660211095,00.html

Thursday, April 12, 2007

A Diamond in the Rough

Well, this is getting tedious. I can no longer simply ignore these emails. I almost feel obligated to chronicle their incredible multiplicity here...

Fortunately, this single email is at least worth reading, due to the use of the following sur-names:
Dummar, Gay and Lummis

The story is kind of interesting too, if you haven't heard it yet.

SL Trib: Melvin Dummar Tries To Resurrect Howard Hughes "Mormon Will" Again In Court

Dummar will try again for Howard Hughes' fortune

Who reads this stuff?

I find it difficult to believe that even Marc A. Bohn reads all of these articles. I think about 90% of them come from this. Maybe he hired an uber-hacker to just automatically email these results to everyone at random intervals?

I am just pissed that I wasn't the lucky uberhacker.

NY Observer: Costly Illusion of Mitt Romney



I guess I wasn't the only one surprised by the BYU approval of the Cheney protests... this is like the 10,000th article that Mr. Bohn has found on the subject, none of them coming from the true font of knowledge: The Daily Universe.

Unfortunately, this one (at quick glance) again offers no more insight than the pictures I already referenced.

NY Times: Rare Protests At BYU Over Planned Cheney Appearance


I really tried to read this...

But, alas... Mr. Madigan spent way too much time blabbing about Kennedy or mines or something to hold my attention... then I noticed from the title, that he wasn't even going to answer the question. Bummer.

Chicago Trib: Mormons Need Not Even Apply?



This one seems vaguely familiar... I think we already had this article a month ago, no?

Washington Post: Killer Rabbits

Boring 1.

Isn't there anything more interesting on the interweb?

Washington Post: McCain, Romney Advisers Spar Over Mormon Religion

Monday, April 09, 2007

Ah, meatheads...

What do you get when you mix BYU honor code officers, the Provo social scene, and a few dumb jocks? If you guessed an award winning football program, you were close.

This article is worth a read, since it involves waterballoons, honor code violations, girlfriends and big strong dumb guys kicking in doors to prove their love for said girlfriend.

A must read.

SL Trib: Police Arrest Two BYU Football Players For Burglary

Police arrest two BYU football players for burglary

Politico eh? I don't like the sound of that.

After skimming the current article (okay the article's first sentence), I made a wonderful conclusion. I can safely add a Rule to my email program discarding anything with the word "Politico" in the subject. That should perhaps change the predictions made below. Then again, at the current clip, I think we will still be right on target.
Skip this one.

Politico: Mormons Heighten Public Relations Efforts

Mormons Heighten Public Relations Efforts

Vague titles represent weak opinions.

Since the title gave really no indication of what this was going to be about, I chose to read the article. Why not? It isn't like I have anything else to read today...

After 2 full paragraphs, I realized where it was leading. Nowhere. That is when I stopped. You should too. Thank me later.

NYT Op Ed: The Presidency's Mormon Moment

Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah.

Newsweek: Is Mitt Romney Ready For Prime-Time Politics?

A rhetorical question, perhaps? Nope. I can answer that one, saving everyone the pain of reading the article.


There you have it.

Newsweek: Is Mitt Romney Ready For Prime-Time Politics?

Is Mitt Romney Ready for Prime-Time Politics? Can Romney, a big shot from
the private sector who is accustomed to control, handle the chaos of a
political campaign?

Saturday, April 07, 2007

CNN: Why This Scientist Believes In God (by Francis S. Collins, Director of the Human Genome Project)

Thanks Marc. I now have something highly relevant to read outloud tomorrow in Fast and Testimony Meeting, while fighting back tears of extreme spirituality. That is if I'm there....

CNN: Why This Scientist Believes In God (by Francis S. Collins, Director of the Human Genome Project)

I enjoyed this, thought I'd pass it along:

Collins: Why this scientist believes in God

Preemptive Strike.

I just figured out how I can make it big. If I could only anticipate what the next bohnspam would be, and send it to everyone BEFORE Marc can, then I'd be a hero! This is as diabolical as it sounds... but requires more effort than any of the other devious deeds yet. I need to find just the right article, and I need to do it before Marc finds it. Anyone who knows Mr. Bohn, also knows that this task is totally, completely impossible... UNLESS, I can do it when he's otherwise busy. That is why I have decided to do a little detective work. Knowing that Marc is a faithful Latter-day Saint (how do I know? See most of the last oh, 100000 emails he's sent out, yup, he's a practicing mormon.) With that knowledge, and a little more personal knowledge, I can look up his Sunday meetings schedule at Then, while he's peacefully worshipping in church, I can be scouring the interweb full stream to find a "Bohnspam" article, and send it to everyone. What's next? PROFIT! Oh, and I have to think of a good excuse to tell my wife about why I can't go to church with her and the kids, but that is just a minor issue. Stay tuned...

Blessings come only after a trial of your faith...

If you remember my last post (it was almost 3 minutes ago!) You might recall I was feeling a bit overwhelmed at the task of keeping up with Marc A Bohn, SuperSpammer. Well, just when I thought I was doomed and could never keep up, he gave me another easy one. How easy? What if I told you it was so easy, you wouldn't even have to read anything? That's right it's true. This one has an audio recording. I recommend this one for 2 reasons. a) it is audio, and anything that keeps you from reading is a good thing.... and b) it is from NPR. Your tax dollars help fund it, yet it is at times, quite a good use of federal money.
Furthermore, I've taken the liberty to edit the body of his original email, to make it more enticing.

NPR Interview: Notre Dame Professor David Campbell discusses Mitt Romney and Mormons

Here's an interesting (albeit short) interview with LDS Notre Dame Professor
David Campbell that aired today on NPR Interview

Mitt Romney and the Mormon Factor in Politics
Click Here to Listen to newest Brittany Spears Album and watch the latest celebrity stupidity caught on camera!

1 minute and 49 seconds...

Just as I started to let my guard down... thinking this was a breeze, I looked back at my inbox... DAMNIT! Less than 2 minutes passed, and I thought for sure I would be done for at least 5 minutes... but no. Another BOMB right there! What to do? (NOOOOOO! I just looked again, and there's a third! This one arrived only seconds after starting my current commentary. I guess I underestimated what I was up against. No more slacking off for me. All is not well on the interzion. I must put my shoulder to the wheel or I am going to be left in the dust. Honey, call the boss... I won't be coming in to work today, or again in the next 3 years. I have a duty, nay, a moral obligation!

2 party politics can reap a two party family! Even the Huntsmans!

Don't read. I haven't? Why should you?

NY Times: A Utah Dynasty Is Divided Over The '08 Race


An easy one...

Well, this blog has become such a piece of cake for me... previous blogging attempts end up boring (for the writer... they start out and will continue to be boring to the reader) and hard to come up with content, that is until recently, when I realized I could let someone do all the hard work, and just write a sentence or two about it, to help everyone involved. This one was a really fat slowball, right over the plate. I didn't have to even finish reading the Subject to know, this is a DON'T READ.

NY Times: 2 Years After Big Speech, A Lower Key For Obama (Editor's note: WOW, how riveting! I'll simply ignore all else in life and on the internet (is there a difference?) to read this one delightful piece!)



In my analysis yesterday, I forgot to do one more quick study. How many of these emails are worth reading? Well, I believe that could be summed up by today's (first?) email. This is one from Kirby. The 4th in the last year. So, breaking from my usual trend of insults, I propose the following. If Kirby, could just send me a notice when he has a new article, worth reading, then I can bypass the bohnspam completely. Or perhaps this message was a subtle insinuation that my blog isn't opening any heart doors? Either way, I've turned over a new leaf. Read this one.

Kirby: Insults never opened the doors of the heart

Kirby: Insults never opened the doors of the heart

Friday, April 06, 2007

A statistical analysis of bohnspam.

Since I was unable to go to work today, I instead chose to use my extreme statistical skills to run a few numbers on my spam from Marc over the last year. What you see below will likely never be published in a peer reviewed journal, nor is it likely very accurate or robust, none-the-less, I think it is relevant. First off, I was curious as to what my inbox might look like in say... 3 years. Well, first, I plotted the number of mass emails I have received from Marc per month in the last year. The results are shown at the right.
The astute reader (or rather picture-looker-at-er) will likely notice the upward trend. Not simple linear trend, but a complex non-linear function. This is likely due to such "life events" as the birth of Marc's first child, law school finals, television programming, and in general, an increase in efficiency and internet usage time. Thus, using highly sophisticated reasoning and computational means, I chose to extrapolate from these data, in order to estimate the number of mass emails I should expect to receive from Marc over the next few years. This analysis is important, as it will allow me to plan my hard drive upgrades as well as estimate whether my current email account will be sufficiently large to be able to hold this increasing onslaught of mailings. In the graph that follows, I chose to use a simple exponential growth function to model the future emailing habits of Mr. Bohn.
Again, one might observe that in just over 2 years from now, I should expect to receive well over 8.5 BILLION such emails per month. To give you perspective on this, this is SIGNIFICANTLY more than I currently receive from ALL sources.* If our national debt was growing at the same rate (which it probably is) we would each owe over $100 for every second of our lives, until we turn the magical age of 72. If that sounds made up, well it is.

Other stats of interest:
Of the current 167 Marc Bohn emails cluttering my inbox, I calculated a few statistics based on the subject, the source of news and other interesting features.

The first interesting finding was that of all the subjects I tested, Mitt Romney was the most common theme. Being over TWICE as common as any other theme. (Mormon being the second most popular, with 3 containing both "Romney" and "Mormon"). This finding, along with other evidence prove unequivocally who Marc will support in the 2008 presidential elections.

In spite of this whole-hearted endorsement of a GOP candidate for '08, another interesting fact is shown: with 10 references to "Democrats" in the subject lines, there were ZERO direct references to the Republican party! Coincidence? I leave that up to the reader to decide...

The most commonly cited source for these emails was the Deseret News, which was the source over 2 times more than any other single news source. Typical liberal media...

Finally, the following chart shows the number of times that Marc has included everyone(all 48 recipients of this spam)'s email address in the email for everyone to see.
Fortunately, I was able to use this list to enroll all readers to this site. Now, you can expect several emails per hour! You can all thank me (and Marc) later.

(Unfortunately, due to the increase in readership and bandwidth... as well as upgrading my harddrive, I was forced to find ways to subsidize this site. If you are looking for a list of well-educated political junkies for campaign fundraising, etc., I have a list of about 46 currently. Just email me and make an offer.)

In conclusion. There is conclusive evidence presented concluding that all concluded conclusions hereafter made are highly likely, given the current data and models.

* Use of all caps is a common method in the most erudite edumacated scientific circles to show emphasis.


100% waste of time. If you don't yet know that Bill O'reilly is a moron, or if you enjoy boring pointless yelling from two extremes, watch. Otherwise, steer clear.


O'Reilly v. Geraldo... beware... it gets a little ugly


O'Reilly summoning his pure, inner rage:

Thursday, April 05, 2007

Article accurately represents subject: boring.

Actually, attending the "protest" was probably rather entertaining... reading about it however, much less so. My recommendation: skip the article and look at the pictures here.

Deseret News: Y. rally quite tame: Demos object to Cheney speech; other students protest the protest


Common Sense.

Okay, file this one in the "common sense" folder. Article summary: Romney asks for and gets donations from those who he has religious, familial or career connections. Brilliant! Patent that Rom, patent that!

NY Times: Romney Used Wealth To Enlist Richest Donors


Romney Used His Wealth to Enlist Richest Donors

Wednesday, April 04, 2007

There is no silver bullet.

While most readers would think that being a Mormon would make the presidential run for Romney a done deal:
a) get baptised at 8
b) announce candidacy for president
c) get elected president
d) profit!

However, this interesting and insightful article proves otherwise. A MUST READ!

Washington Post: Mormon Base A Mixed Blessing For Romney

Finally, something NOT about Romney.

Unfortunately, this article had all the interesting parts in its title. You can stop after reading that.

Washington Post: Obama Raises $25M From 100,000 Donors


Killing for Meat.

Who isn't a life-long hunter? A friend and I shot some birds when we were kids... we fireblasted ants and other bugs with wd-40 and a lighter and I'll likely kill at least one more animal personally sometime before I die. I too am a lifelong hunter. I'll join the NRA when it is free.

Article summary: Romney returns to and flaunts ancestral "hunter gatherer" roots.

AP: Romney, self-described lifelong hunter, has hunted twice

Tuesday, April 03, 2007

Jib Jab attempts to regain popularity with subpar video.

A much less funny movie from Jib Jab (the makers of the "this land is your land" bush/kerry parody)

JibJab: What We Call The News


Here are 1000s of links to long boring articles. Read them all.

Summary: Money can't buy you love.

Romney Tops GOP in fundraising and makes his Doonesbury debut

--links omitted to save your time--

Monday, April 02, 2007

Surprisingly, another person "flip flops" opinion of Bush.

Summary: Don't vote for a bush ever again.

NY Times: Bush's Former Chief Campaign Strategist Loses Faith In President


Sunday, April 01, 2007

And I thought I was not interested in politics...

My relative interest in the Romney campaign just took a giant leap thanks to you Marc! Reading another headline that I care about much much much less than politics has changed my outlook possibly forever.

BBC: Marie Osmond Getting A Divorce


Thursday, March 29, 2007

Not even funny in theory.

If you haven't heard about or seen it, honestly don't waste your time.

MC Rove? You gotta see this...

I'm telling you... this is choice
-- link omitted because I seriously would feel terrible if another person wasted even 30 seconds viewing this --

Wednesday, March 28, 2007

Poll with a bunch of no-names informs ignorant readers everywhere.

I, like most of the rest of america don't care about the primaries. I can't wait 'til they are over so we can start hearing the real contenders whine and sling mud, with an occasional trespassing of some 3rd party nutcase.

Serious, who is this "Thompson", and why should anyone care?

Gallup Poll: Romney taking a big hit with Thompson's possible entry

Looks like Fred Thompson's potential entry is doing serious damage to

Friday, March 23, 2007

Nope. Not one of them.

The frequency of emails has gone up, but the quality, roughly constant.

ACLU Helps Mormon Inmate; Book of Mormon Sells for $180,000; Family Donates Martin Harris Wallet

A few nuggets I saw today that I thought you might find interesting:

Thursday, March 22, 2007

Why you should never trust a blog for your news... (except this one, naturally)

It is a good thing that I
a) don't read these things at all
b) don't care much for politics
c) didn't jump off a bridge at this news

d) it was wrong.

Politico: Edwards To Suspend Campaign Because Of Wife's Cancer

Edwards to Suspend Campaign
The Politico

Monday, March 12, 2007

Not bishop Simpson!?!?

Well, I followed the Gonzales debacle as closely as the next guy (basically not at all) but it really brings it home when someone I've come to know and love is affected. That is why this email brought me to tears. There wasn't a dry eye in my congregation. RIP Bishop Stampson.

Washington Post: Kyle Sampson Resigns From Justice Department

Just thought you'd find this of interest. Bishop Sampson of the Arlington
Ward resigned as Attorney General Gonzales's Chief of Staff yesterday in the
wake of the controversy over the firings of the eight U.S. Attorneys last

-- link removed ---
-- another link removed ---
-- yet another link removed ---

Saturday, March 10, 2007

First --insert band name-- now Boston?

I've heard that the number of deaths goes up in the cold of winter, but here we have a real tragedy. The Vocalist for the hit/hip band "Boston" was found dead? That leaves one less band intact that I know only by familiarity with the location after which they are named. Can someone please go by all remaining members of the bands Kansas, Asia, Europe, Africa, and Chicago to ensure that all is well? Thanks in advance!

It's going to be a rough month I can already tell.

BBC: Lead Singer of "Boston" Found Dead

Boston vocalist Delp found dead

Friday, March 02, 2007

More Romney Spam...

This one was (un?)fortunately classified as spam, thanks to its informative title.

More Romney Spam

A few articles of note:

Monday, February 19, 2007

A "few" (roughly Avogadro's number) Romney articles...

This one was a personal favorite. As I had probably spent less than 3 seconds prior to this email contemplating and discussing the Romney campaign, I was relieved to see that someone had already done all the work for me! It was like cliff's notes for a closet Romney voter! Thanks! Also, while it would be petty (and is asking for retribution) to point out that the phrase "Here's are" is odd, I will nonetheless do so. I couldn't have been the only one that got that far in reading this one could I? Well, no I wasn't since this one ended up being posted elsewhere, making Marc ever more a celebrity.

A Few Romney Article Summaries

While there have been a lot of articles rehashing the same old jazz on Romney
lately, there has been some new material as well. Here's are a few summaries
of some recent articles I found of interest:

-- rather than repost the summary and list here, doubling the current size of the interweb, I invite the masochistic reader to instead turn elsewhere for her self inflicted pain --